Saturday, November 27, 2010

Thankful

This may be a day late, but i do things on my own time anyway :). I was at work today and thinking about how grateful i am for the relationships i have with my family. Like any family, we have our issues...but we really enjoy being together. I love my parents, and they love me. I'm grateful for the close friendships i have with my siblings. They truly are my best friends, and i know that it is rare these days. i'm thankful for my trials and tests i go through in my life. While i'm glad i don't keep score of how well i get through them (i'm sure the scoreboard would read Jill: 2 Trials: 20), its in the struggle that i truly grow as a person and gain the experience i need to be the best Jill i can be. And to be honest, the part of me that seems to be addicted to suffering really enjoys the struggle in some weird, twisted way. Don't judge me. I'm also thankful for the wonderful friends i have and have had in the past... for the love i got from them and the good times we've had. i'm so incredibly thankful for the Atonement and the healing power that comes from knowing i can be cleansed from my mistakes in life and strive to be better with a clean slate. I feel lucky for the life i've had and look forward to the years to come.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Stories Untold (revisited because its true)

its funny the stories we tell ourselves.  its like somewhere along the line somebody or something gives us some cheesy line about who we are or who we're not and we believe them.  The interesting thing is, we often don't become aware of it until we're older and taking a good look at things in our lives and saying "what the crap?...why didn't such and such work out...or, why did such and such happen?"  Some of us operate on the story that we're unlovable and will never find someone to love us.  Some of us read the story over and over again that we can never find a way to be fulfilled and happy because that only happens in fairytales.  We aren't good enough, we don't deserve this or that, blah blah blah blah blah.  How about creating a new story?  Seeing as how every story has to be written by somebody, why not you?  Here's the deal.....you are whoever you say you are.  you can do whatever it is that makes you want to be the best jack or jill or bob that you can be.  Happiness is real, people.  Don't let anyone tell you different.